Saturday, May 9

more from our Scottish political correspondent

You won't have seen the Scottish newspapers yesterday. The Sun,
which is owned by thon Ozzie fascist chap who gets his income from
those proletarians of low intelligence, had a full front page photo of
Ed Milliband eating his bacon sarnie from months ago, and looking
decidedly weird.

And I thought - how low can you get?

Then I looked over to the SNP newspaper, The National, and it had a
smaller copy of that same photo, along with photos of all the other
non-Nat Nutter leaders taken during episodes of severe flatulence and
all looking very weird. Yes, even Broonie suffers from flatulence
from time to time, which added to his glass een, can make him look
extremely weird. And I thought - so that's what it comes down to for
the too-dumb-to-be-able-to-count - i.e. don't vote for someone who six
months ago had a photo of themselves looking weird two hours after
eating a veggie burger.

But don't worry. 66.1% was the turnout in this general election.
84.5% was the turnout in the last Referendum. There are therefore
still hundreds of thousands of folk who, like me, didnae pitch up to
vote yesterday, but who will always, always, always pitch up to vote
No in any Scottish Referendum to defeat the fascist Nat Nutters, the
hopelessly romantic, the bone idle, and those who think Scotland can
nationalise BP.

And we feel secure in the fact that, though the good Nippy Sweetie
may repeatedly threaten to skelp Fat Eck's backside, the man with
verbal diarrhea himself has not only now been let loose on Westminster
and the press in that part of the country, but has also never been
properly potty trained and therefore will always completely and
utterly over-anticipate the ultimate outcome of a Highland Charge. I
would definitely have voted for him if I'd lived in the constituency
of Gordon, simply in order to get him to Westminster.

1 comment:

  1. I say!

    You'd think they would want to concentrate more on their cricket team than all that stuff.

    MM III