Monday, December 24

swimming with the fishes again

Caution - this post is rude in parts, and without photos for obvious reasons.

Christmas Eve was spent snorkelling again, this time at a nude beach so Kev could show off his snorkel. For the record, Albert was in a wetsuit.

It was an unspoilt beach, away from habitation and with absolutely no facilities. Not crowded. A couple of families, several gay couples and singles, some musclebound Mediterranean types, and some very sporting nude babes.

I like to chill, but Kev likes to be active. So while he went walkabout I sunbathed on a towel. Soon, a new couple arrived. They had the whole beach to choose from, yet came over and stood about a foot and a half from my head, talking non-stop in Hebrew or Arabic, and rubbing sunscreen into each other. It went on and on. Finally they lay down, still strangely close to me but at least they quit talking.

Later when I told Kev, he said "yes, they do that all the time, the Islamics, it's how they start riots". Kev's world view is unorthodox to say the least. I suggested it was culturally-different ideas of respecting private physical space, and/or the couple simply needing their heads examined. Reminded me of the the lesbian couple with the screaming baby choosing the table right beside Albert.

After lunch we went rock-scrambling barefoot (not just -foot in Kev's case). Kev, who's every bit as sociable as Albert isn't, chatted along the way to spear fishermen, and to a guy with a plastic kayak that comes apart at the middle (for transport and in case you want to insert an extra mid-section to make it a 2-person kayak).

Whenever we walked past nude babes or a nude couple, Kev with his customary tact would swivel his head and pop his eyes out, and say loudly "that Sheila's got a nice ####". You have to remember he comes from Australia.

We passed a leathery guy lying alone on a rock. Kev said "ask him what he's got on his c@!#". Right enough, the guy had ... well, not so much a cock ring as a whole set of interlocking Chinese metal puzzles. The guy rolled over, and Kev said out loud "oh look! he must want people to see what's wrong with his anus!" And truly there was something unusual there, but mercifully I only caught a glimpse, so there's still a chance I won't have nightmares tonight.


  1. I say!

    I expect that the guy who had the plastic kayak with the extra mid-section to make it a 2-person piece of equipment was quite popular on the nudie beach.

    MM III

  2. I've seen those kayaks, they are handy for travel but have interesting stability issues.

    Sounds to me as if Kev is trying to get himself pounded into the sand.

    I'd pass on a nude beach, there are just too many people in this world I have no interest in seeing naked.

  3. Mingers. I think you're confusing a kayak with another piece of equipment.

    Nanners. It's not about seeing, but about being.

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