Three weeks after my shoes and walking poles left the Bavarian warehouse, they still hadn't arrived here. And nobody could tell me where they were. Disappeared off the system.
I initiated a formal search by the carrier, and the very the next morning the parcel arrived at my door. I thought: aha! I know what's happened! It must have been sitting on the quayside, while the New Caledonian dockers got on with more pressing matters - poker, their own drug shipments, and preparing strike plans. They only get off their backsides after someone actually complains. Typical!
But then I looked at my address on the parcel - instead of New South Caledonia, it said Tasmania. Those efficient Bavarians had managed to detour my shipment via Australia! What's the world coming to, when you can't even rely on stereotypes?
Too funny. I'm wondering about DHL myself.
ReplyDeleteI once sent something from the states to Glasgow. I tracked it and it went from the states to Manchester to Iceland to London back to Iceland and finally to Glasgow.
It was better traveled than I was.
Albert? Walking poles? Don't they even make shoes in yon desert where you like? Hotboy
ReplyDeleteNanners. It was DHL in this case too!
ReplyDeleteHotters. You're thinking of stilts, it seems.
I say!
ReplyDeleteWalking poles - essential! Hotters will not have heard of them yet.
MM III
Mingers. You could use them as spears where you live.
ReplyDeleteAlbert? Only the evil bourgeois, who have never done a decent day's hard work in their lives, could come out with such a remark as that about the dockers. They don't have dockers anymore anyway. They have lorry drivers who move the containers around. Hotboy
ReplyDeleteHotters, what uncharitable stereotyping of the hard-working middle classes, the backbone of western civilization! If you read the whole post, you notice I'm deliberately up front about my misguided stereotyping. You have to remember anyway this is all fiction - my parcel came by plane in real life.
ReplyDeleteThanks to decades of restrictive practices, NSC dockworkers have become career criminals (not all of them, of course). Unless you actually spend time at the docks like Albert, you won't know what I'm talking about. PS I couldn't care less what they get up to after they do the work they're paid for, but dearie me! Bring on the robots!
Mingers. The middle class are above that. The underclass would be humanely put out to graze on beer and chips, possibly sterilized.
ReplyDeleteAlbert? The middle classes being effete and degenerate, weak chinned and heading towards inbreeding, will always be subsumed by the virility of the working classes who can outbreed them any afternoon of the week. Still, being horrible to their children and parents must have something going for it ... naw, the evil bourgeois are just evil! I rest my case! Hotboy
ReplyDeleteNo, you were right Hotters, there must be advantages even to the toilet training severity, maybe it gives the middle classes a sense of empathy with downtrodden minorities. That'd be why they're happy to pay taxes to help them hump their way out of extinction. Does that help?
ReplyDelete