Sunday, June 28

they're back!

The murderous impulses are back. Several times I caught myself, while walking along the street, muttering four-letter courses, mostly under my breath. I discovered a new understanding of people who run amok with guns.

The doctors tell me to try and make sense of the sudden spike in rage levels. Listing the reasons might help:

  1. I had dropped the blissage levels down to a quarter of a pill every two days. Everyone else seemed to giving things up, so I thought I would join in. Stupid stupid idea.

  2. The computer system at work decided to lose three weeks' worth of files. And to make things worse, the useless admin people kept saying they were working on recovering my files, but that was just code for "we're doing nothing about it - eventually you'll give up hope and just do the work all over again".

  3. I'm feeling unsettled because I have to leave my dog in the care of other people for a week, none of whom is as trustworthy as me. And it's all because I have to go away to somewhere sunny, to keep the partner happy. If it was up to me, I would stay home and turn the heating up. But no, we have to join the throngs of people in a hotel.

  4. A tooth nerve is dying, slowly and increasingly painfully. I rang the dentist, but it seems he's already away on holiday, for a month! So I had to see the partner's dentist, a guy with the appearance and demeanour of a Japanese POW guard. I was so appalled by his manner that I asked him to do a different tooth, a relatively healthy one that just needed a wee filling. The guy's a butcher! He drilled away ferociously for what seemed like 20 minutes, then told me proudly that he'd taken away two thirds of the tooth. It made me think - dentists pass one set of exams at age 20, and it gives them the right to do what they like to people for a lifetime. As long the guy never fiddles with the female patients' undies, nobody checks!

Unless I can find a dentist to drill the nerves out in the next few days, I'm going to be holidaying on painkillers and/or spending half the time with a resort dentist. Nothing good ever comes from stepping outside your nice comfortable blissful home life.

11 comments:

  1. Albert? Sorry to hear about the murderous, intrusive thoughts! Flatheids are funged of course, but still you don't have to believe them. And get your tooth fixed for god's sake! That would drive anyone nuts! Hope this helps. Hotboy

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yesterday in the car after a disagreement, I tried closing the eyes and doing the amateur bliss. It was going well until, with the second breath, the partner ran over a pothole. Accidental? I think not.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Albert? I'm surprised you get murderous thoughts. I thought it was just me. Come to think of it, I don't get them anymore. No, I do! But it's just imaginings of stabbing folk and generally brutalising total strangers, so I don't think that counts. Hotboy

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm re-reading The Real Alma Mater. The guy in that had the murderous thoughts, a Columbine ahead of his time.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Albert? You should stop wasting your time in yon jobbie and get the real real Alma Mater published down under. I don't mind if say it was written by you as long as I get ninety percent off the top! Hotboy

    ReplyDelete
  6. hotters, you'd like that, wouldn't you - I get all the law suits from the people defames in it, and ypu get 90%.

    Actually I was thinking of uploading it to scribd (check them out if you like - http://www.scribd.com/)

    It's off on holiday tomorrow. The only reason I need a holiday is I'm so stressed from all the arrangements.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Albert? Upload it wherever. Nobody's going to buy it anyway. Hotboy

    ReplyDelete
  8. I say!

    I'm a bit tipsy tonight, due to Doviko having opened the duty free from Suvarnabhumi. Rotgut, that stuff is. I told him to give it to Wilson, but he insisted that I tried it first, and one thing led to another.

    As a result, and with the added jetlag, and all that stuff, I have no idea how I landed here, and what the topic in question actually is, but let's assume that you have stopped taking the yellow and greens.

    This is always a bad idea. Dr Mohammed up the road (my excellent physician from Cairo, currently residing hereabouts due to his unfortunate legal situation) has always told me:

    "Mingin...whatever you do...wherever you are in the world...however much you may be distracted by pitches and suchlike...never stop taking the yellow and greens. Please! I cannot be held responsible for the consequences, if you do."

    Well, I say. I pass on this advice. That's the best I can possibly do.

    MM III

    ReplyDelete
  9. I say!

    Is your mystery destination the Melbourne Cricket Ground, by any chance?

    MM III

    ReplyDelete
  10. Mingers. Nice idea if you're partial to cricket. Other end of the country actually, where the heat interacted nicely with the yellow and greens, what my colleagues in the business faculty call synergy.

    Returned with enough duty-free XXXX to last a couple of years. A six-pack in fact.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I say!

    Abdul, who, unusually for people hereabouts, doesn't have good teeth, said he once used a pair of plyers on a bad tooth.

    MM III

    ReplyDelete