Sunday, April 26

blissheidism and hotheidism

On Sunday I splashed out on a month's supply of Paulaner, a six-pack. This could help me turn into a blissheid, but it's a distraction from the main goal - getting through the 200 bottles of Peerless before the mexican killer flu arrives at the door.

The bliss partner flies to New Zealand at the weekend, so as a quarantine measure I'll have to brick up my bedroom door while she's away. I've told her I'll pass pills and water to her through the window but only one of us has to get sick at a time.

Actually, I reckon it could be a good move to hang around airports, hugging passengers arriving from hot spots. Catch the flu early, and gain immunity before it mutates into something worse. Also getting in early before antiviral stocks run out.



Every morning I take life-giving pills, the heat-raising ones against fried thyroid. If I ever stop taking them, it's curtains within days. On Sunday I stupidly forgot to take them, and this coincided with a sudden cold spell. Overnight it was only 12 degrees, which is nice if you're in Scotland but here it's a freezer. You know how it is - you wake up shivering but you're too cold to get up and do anything about it. At 4 a.m. I summoned up the courage to get out of bed and fill a hot water bottle. So at least I got an hour's blissful warm sleep until the alarm went off at 5.30.

Then the first day back at work was a scunner. I was too chilled to eat lunch, and so I just got colder and more bad tempered. Monday night I went to bed with 2 hot water bottles and an extra quilt. Overnight I thawed out. Oh the bliss of raising heat again!

4 comments:

  1. Albert? You're so old and doddery that the swine flu is bound to pick you off whether you wear a sombrero or not! Hugging strangers at airports is a good idea if you'd like to go to jail. That's also a good place to avoid the flu since no one there will have been passed the Great Barrier Reef far less on their hols in Mexico! As soon as you start to sniffle, send all the pharmaceuticals to me! Hotboy

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  2. I say!

    More people die around the world in ten minutes from malaria than have died so far from swine fever. That keeps everything in perspective, even though it doesn't balance things up.

    As the Tanzanian malaria researcher Wen Kilama put it some time ago, if seven Boeing 747s full of children crashed into a mountain every day, would the world take measures to prevent it?

    MM III

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  3. Mingin'! Well said, I say! This swine fever has only been caught by the media so far. Oh no! Honk honk!
    Albert: Brilliant to be able to top yourself in a couple of days by not taking some thyroid pills! Wish I could do that. My auntie got a bit of her thyroid cut out once and went from acting like a speed freak to being a sloth. But I'm glad you've got something else to be worried about as I need someone to balance up my total lack of worries. No worries! Hotboy

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  4. hotters - actually you're not right about being picked off. It's people in their prime that are most likely to die, as their hair-trigger immune systems go into overdrive and they fry their own brains. People over 50 or under puberty get it less severely. Once again baby boomers are in the right place at the right time!

    Mingers, as usual your comment is dead right as far as it goes. Getting swine flu just now is indeed a piece of piss, which is why I want to score a dose now, and lord it over everyone else if the eventual mutation or swap of material with other viruses turns it nasty.

    hotters - doc bob tells me I'm not worried, it's just my anatomical background showing. PS - Charles Darwin and I both dropped out of medicine in Edinburgh before roaming foreign lands to observe unusual biological specimens.

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