Sunday, January 3

get out the rowing boat

Two dreams last night of Scots women.

In the first dream, I was on a date with the Domestic Blister, who turned out to be interested in watching me urinate while she threw sharp objects at my willy. What a crazy woman! I had a lucky escape there. In real life I think she's a willy surgeon. It all balances out.

In the second dream, I met up with Denny again. It was very easygoing, but I had to agree to travel with her and her mates to some funeral or other. We were on a ferry, and I offered to buy the first round. I had some trepidation, because in real life demure Doctor Denny turned into Mrs Hyde whenever she drank. So at the bar, I ordered her drink first (a pint of heavy), and I drink half of it while the other drinks (pints of special) were poured.

The bar seemed to have only one tap, and I got to wondering whether heavy and special were perhaps two names for the same thing. Can anyone in the blog community enlighten me?

Very soon there's to be three generations of inlaws and outlaws staying here interminably. They all happen to be feminists but to be honest that's a red herring, almost any gender or persuasion would be insufferable. Already the murderous urges are approaching the top end of the scale. Dearie fungin me!

Note to self - ask the buddhist fundamentalist if the cave on the other side of the island will be free.


  1. Albert? Did you ever buy the first drink ever before? I don't recall this. I don't think you understood John Wayne. You go to the bar and you immediately ask the folk you are with if they want a drink? Remember this? No, I don't think so! So the next time you go to a bar, just forget all that and just order the beers! You're rich! You have a problem with attachment to the nazi gold. Hotboy p.s. I don't mind appearing in the movie if I get to wear a mask and nice sparkley clothes!

  2. Albert? Viz a viz ... The difference between heavy and special? The boy in the court is asked about the state of the murderer when he left the pub. The boy said he'd had six pints of special. The previous evidence was that the murderer had drunk six pints of heavy. The bourgeois basturn who was prosecuting said: What's the difference between heavy and special? One pence said the boy! It's all you have to know. Hotboy

  3. Albert? As far as the radical feminists are concerned, keep asking them for blowjobs. You may not remember what that is, but if you ask them, they will remember it. That's why they're radical and feminists. I would be too! HOtboy p.s. I'm very drunk. If any radical feminists are out there, so am moi!

  4. Hotters - sorry for delay in replying. The reason for your amnesia around my generosity might be down to brain damage. I feel bad if the rounds I bought may be responsible.

    If you could say which one's cheaper, special or heavy, that would help.

    Well one of us has got the feminist blowjob stance the wrong way round. If it's me, that would explain a lot.

  5. Albert? If special was cheaper, it wouldn't be called special. Hope this helps. Hotboy